AMY GALLO: So, Emily, you’re leaving us. Tears.
EMILY CAULFIELD: I know. It’s sad.
AMY GALLO: Tell us what you’re going to do.
EMILY CAULFIELD: So, if you guys remember, we did an episode on side gigs, side hustles, with Brianna Caza, and that was when I talked about starting this little side business of selling vintage clothing. I am obsessed with searching for vintage treasures. It’s my favorite thing to do and has been for many years. So, I started selling items on Etsy and started doing outdoor vintage markets. I’m not expecting to make a lot of money, but hopefully I’ll make enough to continue shopping.
AMY BERNSTEIN: Sourcing.
EMILY CAULFIELD: Continue sourcing inventory.
AMY GALLO: Was it a hard decision to leave?
EMILY CAULFIELD: In a lot of ways, it was very easy. I felt like it was a long time coming. I was considering it for a really long time, and I felt like I had been putting off the decision to finally do it. But I would say that this is a great work environment, and I have really liked working for HBR. I think there’s good work-life balance, and I love the people that I work with. But I think coming out of the pandemic, it’s been a long time of feeling like, Oh, all this shit is happening at me, to me, on me, and then feeling like, OK, time for me to make some decisions. My job was not overwhelming in any way or too difficult in any way, but I am definitely feeling burnt out. I’m not feeling creative anymore. I’m not feeling like I’m producing my best work anymore. I don’t feel like I’m contributing how I want to contribute. So, at this point, it’s like I can’t continue to spend a third of my life – because that’s what a work day is. I can’t continue to spend a third of my life feeling this way in my job, and I want to feel challenged in new ways. I want to feel like I’m creating great work, and I just… I still am desiring that feeling and I’m getting little bits and pieces of that from just doing the vintage stuff on the side. But having limited time to do that, I want more of it.
AMY BERNSTEIN: Are you thinking of maybe turning the vintage clothing gig into a full-time?
EMILY CAULFIELD: I think it’s going to probably be full-time for a few months until I can no longer stand it anymore, or until I have no more money left.
AMY GALLO: I like that.
EMILY CAULFIELD: Yeah. I want to give myself some time to find a little clarity and think about what comes next, because I’m not in a position right now to job search. I just cannot job search right now. People are like, “How is the job search going?” I’m like, “There’s no job search.”
AMY BERNSTEIN: Oh my God, keep your anxiety to yourself.
EMILY CAULFIELD: I’m not doing it. I am not job searching and there’s no plans for it, for at least a little bit of time. But I want to take classes and I want to learn about other fields, and I want to look at design from different angles. My only other plan for this time is I’m going to sign up for a yoga studio because I really miss doing yoga.
AMY BERNSTEIN: Oh, good for you.
EMILY CAULFIELD: And I really miss feeling healthy in that way, and so, that’s my only goal – is to just feel healthy.
AMY BERNSTEIN: That’s an amazing goal.
EMILY CAULFIELD: Yeah.
AMY GALLO: Well, and it’ll put you in the right head space to make these decisions.
EMILY CAULFIELD: And I’ll make this decision now, but then you know what, in a few months I might say, “OK, I want my 9:00 to 5:00 back.” I just need to take a break, and I’m like, “Why doesn’t everybody else need to take a break?”
AMY GALLO: They do.
AMY BERNSTEIN: They do. They just don’t have the wherewithal to do it.
EMILY CAULFIELD: Yeah. I was privileged enough to live with my parents for a year and a half, so I saved up some money while I was with them so I could be able to do this, because I need to be able to still pay rent and pay for my life. But I’m going to be frugal.
AMY GALLO: Yeah.
AMY BERNSTEIN: I mean, I have such respect for you for doing this – recognizing what you need and making it happen for yourself.
EMILY CAULFIELD: Mm-hmm. I didn’t feel like I had any other choice, to be honest. I think I was thinking about this for such a long time, and our last season, I felt like all the episodes were speaking to me. I was like, “Uh-oh, everybody knows,” because we talked about quitting your job and the Great Resignation, and we talked about freelancing and we talked about small businesses.
AMY BERNSTEIN: So, I have been dying to ask you, Emily: How much of that – what you just described – influenced, or how did it influence, your thinking as you made the decision to take a break?
EMILY CAULFIELD: I felt like whenever we covered this stuff in episodes, it inched me a little bit closer in the direction. So, it was, I think, reassuring in some way to cover all of these topics. Not that any of this sounds easy, but just being exposed to those ideas in a really complete way every time we did an episode, it made me even more curious about it – even more wanting to jump into it, even more wanting to try it. Instead of talking about it and being on the outside, I was like, “Oh, I want to be one of those people. I want to be part of the Great Resignation. I want to be part of this.”
AMY GALLO: So, all those episodes we did about freelance and quitting… is there any advice or insights from those episodes that you’re taking into this next phase?
EMILY CAULFIELD: So, I think it was on an episode of The Essentials when I talked to Alice Boyes, and I don’t think we were recording at the time, but she mentioned this idea that really stuck with me. Do you want to live a good life or do you want to live a rich life? Some people want to live a good life. Some people want to live a life where there’s stability, consistency. Or, are you somebody who wants a rich life – who seeks those really high highs, and I guess, in response to that, sometimes has low lows? But you’re in this position of being exposed to new experiences all the time, learning a lot. And I’m really not doing this justice, but when she explained this, I was like, “I really do seek a rich life. I do not seek the stability and the consistency.” I do seek newness and experiences and challenging myself. But that stuck with me. I want to live a rich life.
AMY GALLO: All right. I like it. So, I’m feeling like if we don’t end this episode, then she can’t leave.
AMY BERNSTEIN: She can’t leave.
AMY GALLO: Buckle up, listeners. This is a seventeen-hour —
AMY BERNSTEIN: This a seventeen-year episode so Emily never leaves.
AMY GALLO: You want to go?
AMY BERNSTEIN: I don’t know, I’m not saying goodbye.
AMY GALLO: Yeah. OK. Well, we’re not saying goodbye.
AMY BERNSTEIN: No, we’re not say goodbye.
EMILY CAULFIELD: Yeah. Do not say goodbye.
AMY GALLO: Let’s not say goodbye, because we’re going to see you. We’re going to see you at your markets. You’re going to come visit us. You’ll come have lunch with us?
EMILY CAULFIELD: Yes.
AMY BERNSTEIN: I’m really going to miss you though. I’m really going to miss you as a colleague and as a co-host and as a presence in the office, even though we weren’t in the office very much, these last hideous two years. It’s just been wonderful getting to know you and working with you, and you made us better.
AMY GALLO: Yeah. You made this podcast better.
AMY BERNSTEIN: Yeah, that’s for sure.
AMY GALLO: It’s been a weird two years to do this together in, but your voice has always been a comfort and just thank you for bringing yourself to the show.
AMY BERNSTEIN: Yeah, and your honesty.
EMILY CAULFIELD: That’s so nice of both of you to say. I feel like I’ve learned so much from the two of you. You’ve helped me so much. I’ve reached out to both of you when I’m like, “I don’t know what I’m doing here. I’m scared.” I’m still scared, still doing scary things. So, I really admire both of you and I’ll be looking up to you.
AMY BERNSTEIN: Well, we’re going to miss you behind that microphone.
AMY GALLO: Yeah.
EMILY CAULFIELD: Thank you.
AMY GALLO: Come back and visit.
EMILY CAULFIELD: I will.
AMY BERNSTEIN: I want to come find you at one of these markets.
EMILY CAULFIELD: Yeah. It’s called Still Cute Vintage.
AMY BERNSTEIN: OK! And what’s your Etsy store called?
EMILY CAULFIELD: It’s Still Cute Vintage. And so on Instagram, it’s @stillcutevintage. I have about 100 followers, so I need more.
AMY BERNSTEIN: Thank you. You have 101 now, I think 100 —
AMY GALLO: 102.
EMILY CAULFIELD: Great.
AMY GALLO: Thank you, Emily.
AMY BERNSTEIN: We’ll see you soon.
EMILY CAULFIELD: Thank you, Amys.
Emily's Taking a Break from Nine-to-Five - HBR.org Daily
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